Tuesday was blood work, port flush and a checkup for me, I had not talked to my doctor since March. I am doing great, well, physically I am fine, the mental game is still the toughest part. My poor doctor, her specialty is oncology, but she gets to be my therapist at every visit. I absolutely love visiting with her. I asked her how she does it, her answer, “I have gained 50 pounds over the last 5 years.” I feel you. I want to think we “help” each other during our visits. She always challenges me, this time she tasked me with reading a book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a (I am not going to list the word, but it has 4 letters and starts with the 6th letter of the alphabet) by Mark Manson.
I recognize all my “issues.” I like to say, “You are not the boss of me,” but deep down I am a people pleaser. I don’t want to say I am a perfectionist, but in some areas of my life this is the rule. I also will admit having a hard time being wrong. I don’t get close to people and if you hurt me, I will forgive you, but I won’t go back to you. I love to eat my feelings and I know how to ruin good things. Yep, I get that I am a mess.
I am sharing this with you, because I realize my issues have been the driving force of my last 2 bookworms. Both were written after an encounter with patrons and I don’t like the negative impact they might have had. I wrote about items not being returned, not to call anyone out, but to reiterate that we go at great lengths to not punish our patrons, but to just get our materials back. Last week I stressed that we are open, because my biggest library pet peeve is when people comment on the empty parking lot, as if I can do something about it.
I have not started my book yet, but it is sitting right beside me. My doctor talked to briefly about it and mentioned only giving the 6th-letter-of-the-alphabet-word about 5 things, not everything. This goes against my nature, I give that word about a lot of things, but I can recognize that I need to change that.
Don’t worry, I want say it out loud, can you imagine? I will learn to let things fall from me, I will remind myself of my 5 things that I give the 6th-letter-of-the-alphabet-word about. I will realize that “improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to better stomach lemons.” Yep, that is a quote from the book. So, I ask your forgiveness for my angry bookworms, I won’t promise there won’t be more, because I am an admitted mess and one of my best and worst attribute is passion, it can really get me in trouble.
Upcoming Events: Onsite delivery of SRP activities on Thursday, Gravois Access 4-4:30, Stover 5:00-5:30. 7/15 Story Time and teen fan fiction writing prompt, Wednesday at 10:00am. 7/16 OUR Story at 4:00pm. 7/17 Adult Writing Prompt at 10am. 7/18 at 10:30am Saturday Story Time. Story Walk’s at the Stover and Versailles City Park.